I am just a poor boy
Though my story's seldom told
I have squandered my resistance
For a pocketful of mumbles
Such are promises
All lies and jest
Still, a man hears what he wants to hear
Just a come-on from those gals Just a come-on from the whores
On Seventh Avenue Whoo-whoo!
L... I do declare
There were times when I was so lonesome
That I took some comfort there
La-la-la, la-la-la-la
Bonnie?
Who is it?
Donovan?
Bonnie? Yes?
Donovan?
In here!
Yes? Donovan Is everything all right?
Yeah The production meeting was put off, so I thought... Who's here?
Here? Mm
Who owns that piece-of-shit van down there?
Oh...
It's just a guy, you know, going door-to-door selling pool cleaner
So why did he lock himself in the den?
Well, he...
Oh, God
- Remember my friend Ollie? - Ollie Olerud?
Short, cretinous wanker?
Ohh Ollie's in there?
- Yes - I see
Well, I'm glad he finally got himself a job
I'd always picked him as some sort of deadbeat, but happy to be proved wrong
So, he's selling pool cleaner now, huh?
Well, this is the neighborhood for that Just door-to-door... "Running low on chlorine?"
It's quite a coincidence, him just dropping by
and you two knowing each other so well
Donovan, please, let's just all talk... How you doin'?
Donovan? How you doin', man?
Good day, Ollie I'm great You?
I can't complain, man
Excellent
Well, let's get right down to it then, shall we?
We'll take a couple vacuum hoses We probably need a new filter right about now, maybe...
Wait a minute, darling Do we actually have a swimming pool?
Okay, okay, man Now, let's be reasonable about this, okay?
So, you caught me porkin'...
havin'relations with your old lady
Oh, God
and now we're all feelin' just a little bit embarrassed by the whole thing, so, uh...
What the hey, man
I mean, I know it's a drag and all, but these things...
Hey! Hey, hey
Uh, w-we... we... we didn't actually have sex
I was depressed 'cause I'm impotent You know?
Unable to achieve an erection
I have been for over a year now, man,
and I needed someone to talk to
I mean, think about it, man Ayear without an erection?
Leave him alone!
- You should've seen this coming, you Australian piece of shit! - You bitch!
That's my Daytime Television Lifetime Achievement Award!
Cheesy bastard! Aaah!
You whore!
Oh, Christ!
Okay
All right, you want fun and games? All right
I'll give you fun and games
Explain this away
Li-la-li
Aaah! Ollie! Li-la-li-li, li-la-li
That's myJag! That's myJag! Li-la-li
Li-la-li-li, li-la-li That's my bloodyJag!
Li-la-li-li-li You bitch!
Bitch! Bitch!
Bye-bye, baby!
Oh, what are you looking at?
Explain this away, darling
We're caught in a trap
I can't walk out
Because I love you too much, baby
Why can't you see
What you're doin'to me
When you don't believe
A word I say
We can't go on together
With suspicious minds
Suspicious minds
And we can't build our dreams
On suspicious minds
So if an old friend I know
Drops by to say hello
Would I still see suspicion
In your eyes
But here we go again
Askin'where I been
You can't see the tears are real
I'm cryin'
Yes, I'm cryin'
We can't go on together
With suspicious minds
Suspicious minds
And we can't build our dreams
On suspicious minds
Oh, let our love survive
I'll dry the tears from your eyes
Let's don't let a good thing die
When, honey, you know
I have never
Lied to you
Mm-mmm
Yeah, yeah
We're caught in a trap
I can't walk out
Oooh Because I love you
Too much, baby
Miles Massey's office Hey, it's me Any messages?
Yeah, quite a few Where are you? Just whitening
Jim says he wants a meeting today, if possible Mm-hmm What else?
Chapman says his wife is now in Tahoe
Tell Amstedler I'll return in 20 minutes,
get Wrigley to look up Oliphant v Oliphant, Commonwealth of Virginia
for its relevance in the Chapman filing...
Oliphant v Oliphant, relevance to Chapman... She said she took the kids to Tahoe?
That's right Wait, which side ofTahoe?
She's on some kind of cruise
Yeah, well, if the cruise goes all the way around the lake, she's left the state and she's in breach
Tell Wrigley to prepare a filing to attach A filing to attach
What do you want in it? Everything
Primary residence, beach house, ski cabin, auto, stocks, bonds, dental floss
Everything Uh-huh Gonna lose ya
Uh-huh
And tell Fred Armatrading that we finally have pictures of his wife with the oral surgeon
Oh, and get a fruit and pastry basket in the conference room for my 9:30 Didn't have time for breakfast
Where are you? Comin' at ya
Your 9:00 is here Bonnie Donaly
Mrs Donaly
Hmm
Mm-hmm
Hmm
Yes, your husband did show remarkable foresight in taking those pictures,
and, yes, absent a swimming pool,
the presence of a pool man would appear to be suspicious
But, madam, who is the real victim here?
Let me suggest to you the following
Your husband, on a prior occasion, had slapped you... beat you
I think that word is not inappropriate No, I...
Let me finish, please
I'm not concerned with who slapped whom first
Your husband, who had beaten you repeatedly... No, he never...
Please... repeatedly, was at the time brandishing your firearm
- It was his gun - And we'll get it back for you
Trying, in his rage, to shoot an acquaintance,
a friend of long standing
They never really cared for each other
And if not for your cool-headed intervention,
his tantrum might have ended this schmo's life and ruined his own
As for the sexual indiscretion which he imagined took place,
wasn't it in fact he who was sleeping with the pool man?
No? Am I going too far here?
Were his sexual... No I don't...
Sorry I'm not omniscient
The point is that he acted upon an assumption which he cannot prove,
and I take it you deny
- Well... - Fine I'll take the case
It's imperative that I meet with Oliver Olerud before we proceed any further
so that I can massage the kinks out of our testimony
Do you really think we can put all this across?
The truth is so self-evident to me, Mrs Donaly,
that I'm sure I'll be able to make it equally as transparent to anyjury,
should your husband decide to take it that far
We'll need to caucus again to draw up a picture of your husband's net worth
A map of enemy territory, so to speak
You said he's a television producer? He has a soap opera... The Sands of Time
It's a silly show
Well, it'll be yours soon
Thank you very much
Thank you, Mr Massey Yeah Bye-bye
Still, you have to admire him for taking those pictures
Now, Mrs Gutman,
you testified that you were your husband's sexual slave
for 36 years during your marriage
Except for two years when he was in the navy in Southeast Asia
And before your marriage, what was your profession?
I was a hostess for Braniff Airlines
And what is your husband's profession?
He manufactures staples and industrial brad tacks
He's very successful
How would you describe your husband's sexual proclivities?
Well, at first he was a very gentle and tender lover
But then he became more and more fixated
on toys and machinery and devices of various kinds
I can't help it You don't decide to become bored
It just happens You're just looking for trouble
It's a midlife crisis
Look, get yourself a new car
I have a new car
I have two new cars and a tab at the Mercedes dealership
Torn the house down twice,
rebuilt the cabin in Vail,
got three of those, uh yard people...
Gardeners? Gardeners I've got a man who waxes my jet
These encounters were videotaped
Sometimes there would be a gizmo
A gizmo?
He had a device he called the Intruder
It was something he had the engineers at the factory design
And then he had a prototype built out of the parts from our vacuum cleaner
I see
So the vacuum cleaner wasn't available to me for several months
Several months without the appliance Yes!
The problem is, everyone is willing to compromise
That's the problem with the institution of marriage It's based on compromise
Even through its dissolution
Mrs Gutman here, she's gonna score some points
concerning her husband's sexual politics
Naturally, we'll try to impeach
And then the entire process will find an equilibrium point
based on the skill of the individual lawyers
Then both parties will go home with their portion of the staple factory
That's life Life is compromise
That's not life That's death
Struggle and challenge and ultimate destruction of your opponent... that's life
Let me ask you something
Attila the Hun
Thank you, Mrs Gutman Ivan the Terrible Henry the Eighth
Mr Massey, any questions? What do they have in common?
Middle name No They didn't just win They... They...
Mr Massey? They destroyed...
Mr Massey, again I ask,
have you any questions for the complainant?
I'm sorry, Your Honor I was just consulting with an associate
Now, Mrs Gutman,
do you know a man named David Gonzalez?
Well, he's the tennis pro at the club
The tennis pro?
Then why are your letters addressed to him, "Dear David and Goliath"?
Whoo! Whoo!
Go, Rexie!
Go, Rexie baby!
Whoo-hoo!
Whoo!
Rexie!
Cabin seven
Choo-choo!
Whoo-whoo-whoo!
Choo-choo!
Choo-choo
Choo-choo!
Choo-choo
- Choo-choo - Choo-choo
Choo-choo
- Choo-choo! - Whoo-whoo!
Choo-choo!
Ahh! Oh! Choo!
Yeah!
I'm gon' nail yo' ass!
Oh, I'm gon' nail yo' ass! Yo' ass!
I'm gon' nail yo' ass! Come to papa!
I'm gon'nail ya! Yeah, I got ya!
I'm gon'nail yo'ass! Enough, I say!
Hold it! I'm gon'nail yo'ass!
Yeah! Yeah!
A silly misunderstanding... Mm-hmm Someone nailed yo'ass!
Mm-hmm, yeah, I'm gon' nail yo' ass! I'm gon' nail yo' ass!
I'm gon'nail yo' ass!
Yep, I nailed his ass
I thought he'd outgrown trains
They never grow up, lady They just get tubby
How charming An aphorist
Oh, yeah, I've always had ample proportions
But believe you me, it's all muscle I'm as hard as a rock
I'm not one of these cream puff, sit-behind-the-desk private dicks
I'm an ass-nailer So I see
Gym four times a week... hour and a half, plus stretching,
LifeCycle, LifeStep, LifeCircuit
Gus Petch don't pussyfoot around
I must say, for someone in your line of work, you don't exhibit a great deal of tact
You want tact, call a tactician You want an ass nailed, you call Gus Petch
Christ, you seem to be taking it pretty good
I seen 'em come in here, weep and wail like Baptists at a funeral
Like they hired me to prove their husbands weren't foolin' around
Don't get me wrong, Mr, um... Petch
Gus Petch
Whilst I don't find this terribly amusing, I am delighted that you found this material
This is going to be my passport to wealth,
independence and freedom
Sounds like to me you gon' nail his ass
Honey? Honey!
Rex, get away from the door
Honey?
My key doesn't work
Can we talk about this?
Rex, get away from the door
Oh, look, I know that you're upset, honey
Rex, for your own safety, get away from the door
I don't like having to set the dogs on you
Oh, for crying out loud, if we could... Dogs?
Yes, dogs
I wanted some security since I'll be living here alone
Look, Marylin, can't we have a civilized discussion about this? Our lawyers can
Aaah!
You have a discovery hearing at 5:30 for the Maxine Gopnick case
Discovery? Gopnick? And a Lance Kelso called
He read your article about palimony settlements Lance Kelso
in same-sex partnerships
and would like to schedule an appointment Same-sex
Arthur Yardumian and his tax attorney want to reschedule their caucus for tomorrow
Yardumian? Arthur had to fly to Atlanta for a deadbeat dad hearing
Atlanta? And your 10:30 is here Rex Rexroth
- Rex Rexroth? - Real estate He's okay
Mr Rexroth
Uh, call me Rex Please
Miles Massey Please sit Relax
Consider this office your office, your haven, your war room for the duration of the campaign
Thank you
Now, sir
tell me your troubles
Well
my wife has me between a rock and a hard place
That's her job You should respect that
When I first met Marylin, we were crazy about each other
Not emotionally, of course Just, we couldn't keep our hands off each other
But then... then...
Time marches on
- Ardor cools - Yeah
So, um, we had an understanding
Whereby? We could see other people
Has Mrs Rexroth pursued the opportunities implicit in your arrangement?
Uh, I can... I can only assume...
Not in court, you can't
- Has she retained counsel? - I don't know
- She has rottweilers - Not a good sign
And have you yourself exploited your understood freedom?
There's a lady
A- Ayoung lady
She lets me be myself Of course
And your wife is aware and/or has evidence?
- Video - Hah!
To cut to the chase, forensically speaking,
is there a prenup?
"The fault, dear Brutus, lies not in our stars, but in ourselves"
Let me ask you this... What kind of a settlement do you seek?
What are, for you, the parameters of the possible?
Well, that's the problem
I can't afford to give her anything
Nothing?
Yeah, I know that sounds a little rough, but listen,
I'm about to close a deal to develop some mini-malls
I'm mortgaged up to my heinie
If this deal goes south, I am ruined I will lose millions
So you propose
that, in spite of demonstrable infidelity on your part,
your unoffending wife should be tossed out on her ear?
Well, is that possible?
It's a challenge
Why don't you come out to Malibu and see my new beach house tomorrow
I didn't know Dmitri had a beach house
Neither did I until my lawyer found it Quite a paper trail
He had it in the dog's name Oh
Well, tomorrow won't work I'm having a body wrap
How's Wednesday? Hair appointment in the morning
Afternoon? Shrink How's your Thursday?
I'm having facial injections That kills Friday and Saturday
- Botox? - Butt fat
Does that really work? You tell me
Hello, darlings Mwah!
So, you and Rex are...
Well, as my private investigator put it, we're gonna nail his ass
I've been trying to nail George's ass for years, but he is so careful
Oh! Oh!
Are you all right, Claire?
Down the wrong pipe
- So, who's your lawyer? - Freddy Bender
I have an appointment this afternoon with Rex and his schnauzer
So, who's Rex's guy? Miles Massey
Miles Massey? Of Massey, Myerson?
Do you know him? By reputation
And, Marylin, he's no schnauzer
He got Phyllis Rumsey that cute little island of George's
George was so impressed, he hired him when he divorced his second
- Muriel Rumsey - Who's she?
Now? Night manager at McDonald's
But, Marylin, do we have a man for you
Thorstenson Gieselensen
He just separated from his third He's in fish
He is fish Well, he's tuna
Ladies, I'm not seeing anyone until I've finished nailing Rex's ass
But, Marylin, this man is tuna
Sarah, one husband at a time
I'll do the talking
I know you'll be tempted to chime in, but remember that you're in an emotionally vulnerable state
I'm the professional Oh
Okay
Freddy
Freddy Bender, this is Rex Rexroth
And you are the lovely Marylin
Please, Ms Rexroth
And you must be Mr Massey
Please, Miles Sit
Sit down
Freddy, I was sorry to hear about the Goldberger award
Pastry?
We did very well
Not to worry, Mrs Rexroth You're ably represented
I'm sure Freddy's just too modest to tell you he used to clerk for Clarence Thomas
Pastry? Going begging
Don't try to bait me, Miles
If you have a proposal to make, let's hear it
Well, at this point my client is still prepared to consider reconciliation
My client's ruled that out
My client is prepared to entertain an amicable dissolution to the marriage without prejudice
That's a fart in a stiff wind
My client proposes a 30-day cooling-off period
My client feels sufficiently dispassionate
My client asks that you not initiate proceedings pending his setting certain affairs in order
What's so goddamn funny?
Please, let me handle this
All right, so much for the ice-breakers What are you after, Freddy?
My client is prepared to settle for 50 percent of the marital assets
Why only 50, Freddy? Why not a hundred?
While we're dreaming, why not 150?
- Are you familiar with Kershner? - Kershner does not apply
Bring this to trial, we'll see if Kershner applies
What's Kershner? Please, let me handle this
- Kershner was in Kentucky - Kershner was in Kentucky?
- Kershner was in Kentucky - All right, Freddy, forget Kershner What's your bottom line?
Primary residence, 30 percent of remaining assets
What, are you nuts? Have you forgotten Kershner?
Freddy, it's a negotiation
See you at the preliminary
Freddy, we're all friends here
It's a negotiation Hey, uh...
Freddy!
Fine We'll eat the pastry
I thought that went well
Don't cry out loud
Oh, yeah
Gus, you outdid yourself
Mm-hmm Hear, hear
Mm-hmm, that's cool Very cool
Let's go back to the football game!
Oh, kiss my ass, now It's halftime, man This is some good shit
I'm 'bout to nail his ass right here
Gussy, go back to the Rabinowitz tape again
Hold on, now Here come the good part She 'bout to take off her panties
Oh, yeah Come on, come on, come on
Gus? Mm-hmm... Yeah?
It's Miles Massey Uh, take a number
It's about a job tonight!
Goddamn it
Aah! Aah! Did you see that? Oh, come on, man!
Here we are
Ms Rexroth, I am so delighted you decided to come
Well, I must admit I was curious
Something to start? Some wine, perhaps?
Red? French?
Bordeaux? Chateau Margaux?
'57? '59
'54
Mmm, Mr Massey Good, sir
Your husband had told me you were the most beautiful woman that he'd ever met
I didn't expect the most beautiful woman I'd ever met
"Dismiss your vows, your feigned tears, your flattery,
for where a heart is hard they make no battery"
"Whoever loved that loved not at first sight?"
Now, you didn't ask me here to pick me up
You could be disbarred for that
Maybe I'm reckless
What was your performance about this afternoon? What did your lawyer say?
Oh, Freddy thinks you're a buffoon
He says you've been too successful,
you're bored, complacent, and you're on your way down
But you don't think so How do you know?
Why would you be here? Why did you ask me?
Can't I be curious? About what?
Do you ever answer questions? Do you?
I'll have the tournedoes of beef The lady will have the same Thank you
Thank you, sir
I assume you're a carnivore
Oh, Mr Massey, you have no idea
Miles, please
Tell me more about yourself
All right, Miles
Let me tell you everything that you need to know
You may think you're tough, but I eat men like you for breakfast
I've invested five good years in my marriage to Rex,
and I've nailed his ass fair and square
Now I'm going to have it stuffed, mounted
and have my lady friends come over and throw darts at it
Man-hater, huh?
People don't go on safaris 'cause they hate animals
So it's just for the hunt, with the trophy at the end
No Nothing so frivolous
This divorce means money
Money means independence
That's what I'm after
What are you after, Miles?
Well, I'm a lot like you
Just looking for an ass to mount
Well, don't look at mine
Yeah
Oy vey
I got ya See this?
Yeah?
Uh, I'll just have a, um, salad, please
Um, baby field greens
What did you call me?
Uh, no, I-I... I- I didn't call you anything
You want a salad? Yeah Do you... Do you have a, uh, green salad?
What the fuck color would it be?
Why are we eating here?
What's his problem?
Just bring him an iceberg lettuce and a mealy tomato wedge smothered with French dressing
- And for you? - Ham sandwich on stale rye bread Lots of mayo, easy on the ham
- Slaw cup? - What the hell
Hello, Marge How are you, Gus?
I'm all right
Okay, now, I Minoxed her address book
Don't call me anymore for this penny-ante shit
I shoot action Me and the Ikegami, Jack
Thank you, Gus
And those rottweilers were a menace, man
I told you she had dogs
Yeah You ain't tell me they had a hard-on for anus Africanus
Gus, did you see any evidence,
any telltale signs
of indiscretion on the part of Mrs Rexroth?
What are you talkin' 'bout, "telltale signs"?
Look, I see an ass, I nail it
I don't sneak around sniffin' at sheets
Goddamn it, I'm Gus Petch!
Couldn't you be disbarred for that?
No, I don't think so Maybe if I'd had the patty melt
You had a guy break into her house and photograph her address book
No, Wrigley, I happened to let a man know
that I was interested in her address book... that's not criminal
I also happened to let him know that I was taking her out to dinner
That's not a crime either
No, I don't see myself as culpable in any sense
You, on the other hand, could be disbarred
for developing and examining these photos of her address book,
but that doesn't really concern me
Right
Who are you looking for? Tenzing Norgay
That's someone she slept with
I doubt it Tenzing Norgay was the Sherpa that helped Edmund Hillary climb Mt Everest
And Marylin knows him
No, you idiot Not the Tenzing Norgay Her Tenzing Norgay
I'm not sure that I actually follow that
Few great accomplishments are achieved single-handedly, Wrigley
Most have their Norgays
Marylin Rexroth is even now climbing her Everest
I wanna find her Norgay
But how do you determine which of the people on here are...
How do you spot a Norgay? Yeah
You start with the people with the funny names
Oyez, oyez Family Court of the Fifth District of Los Angeles County now in session
The Honorable Marva Munson presiding All rise
Have you sat before her before?
No No, the judge sits first Then we sit
Well, have you sat after her before?
Sat after her before? You mean, have we argued before her before?
The judge sits in judgment The counsel argues before the judge
So, have you argued before her before?
Before her before, or before she sat before? Before her before
I said, before her before No, you said before she sat before
I did at first, but... Look, don't argue
I'm not I'm... No, you don't argue We argue
Counsel argues You appear
Thejudge sits Then you sit
- Or you stand in contempt - And then we argue
The counsel argues Which you've done before
Which we've done before Ah
But not before her
Rex Sit
There it is! I got it!
I'm gon' nail yo' ass! Enough, I say!
I'm gon' nail yo' ass! Yeah!
Yeah, I'm gon' nail yo' ass! A silly misunderstanding...
Get that thing off me!
Yeah, I'm gon' nail yo' ass!
I'm gon' nail yo' ass! I'm gon' nail your ass!
Devastated
Simply devastated
Thank you, Mrs Rexroth
Mr Massey, any questions?
"Dismiss your vows,
"your feigned tears, your flattery,
for where a heart is hard they make no battery "
Mrs Rexroth, do you know those lines? Objection, Your Honor
- Grounds? - Uh, poetry recitation
Let me rephrase Mrs Rexroth
how high is that wall around your heart?
Your Honor, this is harassment,
and, frankly, it's still a little, uh, arty-farty
- Rephrase Mrs Rexroth, have you ever been in love? - Yes
Of course
With Rex
And you've always loved him?
"Whoever loved that loved not at first sight?"
S...
So it's your sworn testimony that you have loved Rex Rexroth
since first you met?
Yes
Thank you
No further questions, Your Honor
Who's next, Mr Bender?
- We rest, Your Honor - Mr Massey
Your Honor, I call Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy
Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy
Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy!
Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy
Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy!
Problem? Puffy
Heinz, the Baron Krauss von Espy! Tenzing Norgay
Mr Krauss, do you solemnly swear that... Krauss von Espy
Mr Krauss von Espy, do you solemnly...
Baron Krauss von Espy
Solemnly swear that the testimony you are about to give shall be the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth,
so help you God?
- Mais bien sūr - No maybes
Mais bien sūr But of course, yes
The baron does not lie Have a seat, sir
Did you sleep with him?
Don't be a fool
Shush, Elsbieta Shush-shush-shush-shush
Baron von Espy, what is your profession?
Silly man I am a baron
Yes, but do you not also hold a day job?
Paying job A, uh, a square job
Well, one has to live
I am the concierge of Les Pantalons Rouges
at Bad-Gadesbourg in the canton of Uri
And what does that job entail?
I satisfy such requests as the clientele may present
Towels, ice, et cetera?
We have bellmen for that No, no, no
Such requests that, were you at home, you would address not to your valet
but to your majordomo
Shush, poochy-chow
I see Baron, do you recognize that woman?
Ah, cher Marylin But of course
Look who is here Hi!
And she was a guest of the Red Trousers?
Oh, many times,
for relaxing and making Alpine recreation
Mm-hmm I am curious about her visit of five years ago
January 1998
Can you remember any specific request she made at that time?
- Yes, I can - At what, at that time, did she tell you she required?
She said that she required
a husband!
Do you want some bones? Huh? Does Elsbieta want some bones?
Has anyone any bones?
Does anyone have any bones? B... Uh, bones? Dog candies?
No, they are not candies Milk-Bones Hard, crunchy bones for the teeth
Uh, hard, uh...
We'll attend to the dog later
Now, Baron...
Where were we?
"She said that she required a husband
"Oh, do you want some bones?
"Does Elsbieta want some bones?
Has anyone any bones? Hard, crunchy bones for the..."
Right
Now, a husband That's an unusual request
Did she specify what kind of a husband she was looking for?
Stop him Objection
- Grounds? - Uh hearsay
It's not secondhand, Your Honor This is direct testimony about the baron's own conversation
- I'm going to allow it - Yeah
She said she wanted a very rich husband
She wanted to know the businesses and the wealths-s... the wealths-s-s...
Can I say this? Wealths of our various eligible guests
And did she have any other specifications?
- Objection, Your Honor Inflammatory - What's good for the gander, Your Honor
- Is this a legal argument... "What's good for the gander"? - You got to play your tape, Freddy
Mr Massey has a point there I'm going to allow it
Were there any other specifications?
She "specificated" a silly man
Objection, Your Honor! I'm going to allow it
She "specificated" a man who, though clever at making money,
would be easily duped and controlled
Objection, Your Honor Shut up, Freddy She's allowing it
She "specificated"a man with a wandering pee-pee
How you say? Aphilanderer whose affairs would be transparent to the world
Objection, Your Honor!
Finally, a man whom she could herself brazenly cuckold
until such time as she might choose to, uh...
We would say, "faire un coup de marteau sur des fesses "
You would say, "make hammer on his fanny"
- Your Honor, Objection! L-Irrelevant! - I'm going to allow it!
Tell us, Baron... Did you introduce her to such a man?
Sir, I am the concierge!
And to whom did you introduce that calculating woman?
I introduced her
to that silly man
Your Honor, objection!
Let the record show that the baron has identified Rex Rexroth as the silly man!
I did it! It was I!
I introduced her to that silly man!
- You son of a bitch! - The red-faced angry one I introduced them!
Absolument! I did it! It was I!
I just love trains!
I love trains! If you please, sir!
I'm not sick! You're the one who's sick!
No... If you please...
Not the larynx!
Objection, Your Honor! Strangling the witness!
I'm going to allow it
Well, I think it stinks
They left you with nothing
Makes you wonder about the entire legal system,
like Rodney what's-his-name
They bought Massey's argument
If I lied or cheated and was with Rex only for his money,
then he shouldn't have to give me any
Well, that makes no sense Why else would you put in all those years?
Oooh!
Are you all right, Sarah?
Yeah Wh-What is it?
Peptic ulcer
I have medication, but I can't take it before elective surgery
You shouldn't be living here alone, Sarah
My goddamn husbands gave me the ulcer
But a bottle of Bromo can't love you back
Yeah
It's a catch-22
I have to admit, I don't like living alone
I mean, do I need 46 rooms?
You could see people
It's risky Palimony
Son of a bitch Marvin Mitchelson
I'm telling you, honey, getting laid is financial Russian roulette
Maybe I shouldjust tear it all down, build a cottage
More landscaping
Well, with my money, I can't afford to be fooling around
Besides, I have you
It'll be fun... just the girls
Well, thanks, Sarah, but I can't sleep on your couch forever
I'm going to marry again,
nail the guy's ass good
And this time there'll be no Puffy von Espy
Knock knock
Excuse me Mr Donaly?
Mr Donaly?
Mr Donaly, excuse me
You are Donovan Donaly?
I'm in a meeting Mr Donaly
I need a name
And, of course, we will have to litigate Sentence, paragraph
Naturally, the first concern for both parties
is the welfare of little WendellJunior
Nevertheless, we do question whether the continuing expenses for his special ed classes
are truly justified, given the great strides...
Mr Massey, the senior partner would like to see you
Herb wants to see me? If you have a moment
Fourteen summaryjudgments sought
Thirteen granted
Eighteen movements to void for respondent's prejudice
Eighteen granted
Twelve court days on the Rexroth case alone
320 billable hours paralegal services
680 billable
at full attorney rate
Eighty-five lunches charged
Counselor
you are the engine
that drives this firm
Mr Massey?
Please, no calls
I'm feeling a little fragile
I'm sorry, Mr Massey, but I felt certain you'd want to know Marylin Rexroth wants to see you
Marylin... Uh, uh, uh, w... Uh, when did she, uh...
She's here now
Is she armed? Give me a minute
Marylin
How nice of you to...
Marylin?
Shame on you
Marylin
What a lovely surprise
Marylin, what a pl...
- Who the hell are you? - Hello, Miles
So nice of you to see us
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